Stop Being So Personal

Episode 6

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When to Avoid Personal Language...

When we open our mouth to speak, lots of sounds come out. Right?

Did you ever notice that some people are speaking but the words they use don’t create action?

The team doesn’t comply, or the job simply doesn’t get done?

Maybe you have a job where the company tells you everything we are but you keep seeing no one living up to the grand stand mission statement.

Bad company culture can kill the fun for all of us and interestingly a lot of it comes down to poor language use leading to misconduct which then makes our moral drop like a lead balloon.

The downside of toxic workplace cultures is the use of the cheesy last ditch attempt to win employees over by the use of “we statements.”

personal language

When I was a kid my mum loved the good old “we statements.” In the lead up to dinner time, she would make them all the time. She had a full on propoganda campaign around gross vegetables going on.

I’d be home from school and ask (of course), what’s for dinner?

Mum would reply chirpily,

“We are having delicious peas, cabbage, brown rice and lentils.”

Now I was a whiny kid, with a high pitched voice (nothing’s changed) and tonnes of drama to boot. You can imagine my non compliance at dinner time. Those goddamm peas and cabbage stayed put.

I even had them served up cold at breakfast once. She was mercenary.


Notice that the use of “we” didn’t serve to convince me of anything?

When it came to dinner, the only ones eating the peas and cabbage were everyone, other than me.

Mum was there, trying to get me on board and build a healthy little 8 year old and I was in my own lane, craving potato chips or 7 nights of spaghetti (nothing has changed there either).


And there is a time and place where “we statements” or bottom line personal language, is not helpful even for adults.


Company language, small business language and your social banter all need a balance between personal and informal language. This Little Shot Episode is going to show you research based tips for when to stop being so personal.


The Little Shot is here to build your communication in lots of little shots until you become a Big Shot communicator (in the nicest possible way), so I hope you find this episode affirming.

You might even need to share it with your CEO if you think that “we” language is happening all to often. 

Scroll to watch the 5-min tutorial

Stop Being So Personal

Episode 6

This little shot is scheduled for 10am on Tuesday the 19th of May. If you arrive here earlier, don’t forget to turn on notifications via the YouTube premiere button so you can be first to know once the mini tutorial pushes live.


Kouchaki, M., Gino, F. & Feldman, Y. (2019). The Ethical Perils of Personal, Communical, Relations: A Language Perspective. Psychological Science 30(12) 1745–1766. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797619882917

Have you got an ISO buddy, spouse or scary boss, who needs to watch This Little Shot?

Why not give it a share and if you enjoyed this video don’t forget to give it a thumbs up.

Remember, it’s not just how you say it. What you say also matters.

Ciao for now!


Now for our weekly question. 

what is the little shot?

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